Being a Kauffman

My cousin Stephanie told me she would like to read more blog posts about my family. So here is a little glimpse into the Kauffman family. I am going to warn you in advance that you're going to read things you cannot unread and see things you cannot un-see. If you've ever been over for dinner then you know exactly what i mean. Just before writing this i discovered a severe amount of blood in my sink (my nice clean sink). This probably means that Hudson had a nosebleed in my bathroom (my nice clean bathroom). Most people would be bothered by that-im not, or going to see if he needs help-im not. Im sure whoever gave him this nosebleed had proper motives. See, Hudson likes to do this thing where he hides in your room, sometimes for extended periods of time, waiting for you to come in so he can jump out and scare you. Last week he was in my closet. he scared me so bad i jumped up and accidentally kneed him in the face. So when people get hurt around here no one is really alarmed.




Being a Kauffman means several different things-it means hiding cereal boxes in your room because you know everyone will eat all the lucky charms. It means putting up with the same 3 dyslexia jokes. It means trying to decorate for holidays but miserably failing every time. It means people coming into your room in the middle of the night to let you know they just found a cockroach. It means living with Hudson-which brings in a whole new series of problems. Most importantly it means the ability to have no shame. Consistently being late to church, school, and weddings-no shame, strategically stealing all of the chick-fil-a mints-no shame, openly talking about and describing abnormal bodily functions-no shame, and always attempting to sing the guitar solo's of every song-no shame. The list goes on.



Kauffman life does have its perks though. Nothing makes me happier then listening to Nathaniel make up raps about Odysseus, "I don't mean to talk astronomy but really honestly, its all about the odyssey." Or watch Hudson sing "I Will Survive" while cleaning that bathroom. I also love having dance parties in the kitchen and taking Evan to see terrible movies about dolphins. I love going on road trips, I love playing Quelf, I love listening to their jokes, and i love them!